Just Wipe It

I like to consider myself privileged person when I log into the World of Warcraft. Not just because of the detailed environment and lore. Nor is it because of the fact that there's endless comedic value when doing battle with the RNG each week. In actual fact, I liken the RNG to a cold, cruel monster, whose heart was slowly and painfully extracted by a certain female, who then proceeded to drive said heart into the ground whilst reading bad Goth poetry and talking about her true 'soul mate'. And then she slams your dick in the car door. This monster feeds on your fear as you cautiously approach, hope heavy in your unmentionables for that special piece.

No, what makes this game great is the diverse range of people in it. All portions of the Globe are represented in JWI, from the Chinese, to the Taiwanese, to the Malaysians to the Viets to the Singaporeans. The problem with such diversity however, is that inevitably the camps are split into "whitey' and 'non-whitey' and in a skill-rewarding environment like JWI, those in the whitey camps are penalised by the sub-standard gaming brains. You can pump all the money into lowerping.com that you want, but in the end it's going to do you no good when Lob can pull off 20000 APM and somehow morph the game to give him a .5 second global cool down, all while doing his work and delivering a speech worthy of a literary prize. The penalty for being white in Blizzard games is like if you'd picked a shitty race (like a troll warrior, or orc).

Even despite such an obvious handicap, I don't feel envious of our asian brethren, nor is there any discernable racism. To quote Full Metal Jacket "There is no racial bigotry here. I do not look down on niggers, kikes, wops or greasers. Here you are all equally worthless.".

What confuses me, much the same way a fat kid is confused when placed between two succulent, moist chocolate cakes, is the invariable female hate created by select (not you, èbay) members of the guild. Everyone has the right to be Homosexual, Heterosexual or Metrosexual as they choose but what should no be tolerated is Asexuality. Basically these are the guys who are too much of a pussy to choose a team to bat for, and the invariable pent up rage gets unleased on the very delicate souls that they should be trying to seduce. Of course, if you played WoW with us as much as we do, you'd be forgiven for thinking that there are no girls on the internet. This is only partially true - there are no girls on the internet, but only because they're all having phonesex with Lancel. Hot, disgusting, milk over the walls cowsex, complete with bullscreams, whilst Dragonforce plays in the background. Could said milk be drunk with chocolate cake? I must try it.

I'd like to hear your thoughts. Should a certain member of the guild be allowed to sit on the fence, or should he choose his side once and for all? It'd be a grave abuse of my power to tell you that said fence sitter’s name is Libba, so I won't.



In other news, we're still looking for a Feral Druid. This is primarily because we're trying to string out the melee as long as possible with a faint hope of doing actual 4 figure DPS. It's like dangling a carrot in front of a horse - only at the end of the racetrack there's no prize money, but a trip to the knackers to be turned into my nightly jelly for those too stupid to reroll easymode Warlock and Hunter DPS, where the loots drop so plentifully I could smear them on myself in a fantastic orgy of purple. Please nosey on over to the recruitment forum if you think you have what it takes (and do yourself a favour and read the stickies before applying. Please. Do it for me.)